Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Well my grandma put the turkey in the oven for 4 hours and didn't have the oven on.
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
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