Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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