It's Friday. Sex?
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
