I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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