Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Randomize
