just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Randomize
