May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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