dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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