So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Randomize
