im gay
i know
yea but for you.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
