we're blogging at a bar
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize