Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
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