You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
