5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
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