Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
Randomize
