i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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