Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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