how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
