So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Randomize
