id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Randomize
