I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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