he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
