i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I can't believe I got dumped for a fat chick, but at least I got four and a half years worth of free shit. So we can call it even.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
