I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Randomize
