I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
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