lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Come on in and take your pants off
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