yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
