Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
COCAINE IS GR8
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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