mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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