I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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