Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i permit you to call me
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
