she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I have tasted many bathrooms
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Randomize
