Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
there was a trapeze. enough said
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I swear to all that is holy, next time you get my mom high with your "special bake sale" I am going to put your dick in the blender.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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