you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
Randomize
