i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
