That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
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