I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
