butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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