who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
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