I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
