Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
