I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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