Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
Randomize
