we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
