it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
Strip clubs it is bday boy. One condition. I am in full custody of your ID. I plan on being in no condition to coordinate rescue operations and we need to keep casualties to a minimum. You cannot be trusted.
Alright goddamnit. Can I bring my pirate hat?
I insist.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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