He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
