i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Step 1: Buy a house Step 2: Turn bedroom into sex dungeon
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
