like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I'm leaving my hospital band on when we go drinking tonight. I'm aiming for pity sex.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
