Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
