Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
I just realized that at some point last night I told someone I would only be friends with 16% of them because the other 84% stole my people's land
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize
