Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
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